Hello from an increasingly autumnal Southern hemisphere.
In a few days, I’ll be flying up North. North being a place I haven’t been in a year, because, amazingly, I haven’t been on a PLANE in a whole entire YEAR.
(There is a lot of capitalization in that sentence.)
Since I started flying as a kid, this is the longest I’ve gone without the obnoxious buzz of a jet engine. But hey, #twinpregnancy and #preemies and #twins can do a doozy on your travel life. Alas, Executive Platinum on American Airlines I was not, in 2016.
So here’s the thing: Next week, I start traveling again.
And I start it with a bang, spending three of the four weeks of May on the road, occasionally with a child in tow. It’s all happening because I’ve got a lot going on right now, and when I have a lot going on it seems that travel comes along with it.
First there’s a big book coming out. One Minute Mentoring: How to Find and Work with a Mentor – and Why You’ll Benefit from Being One, which I wrote with Ken Blanchard of The One Minute Manager fame, publishes on May 2. Then the next week I’m kicking off a big online event that I’ll be officially announcing in a couple days (but see a sneak peek preview here).
Over the years, I have found that whenever I have the most stuff happening in life is also when the bad voice in my head is the loudest. The compare and despair voice. The “you prolly can’t do it” voice. The “her Instagram looks really pretty because her kids’ wardrobes aren’t made up entirely of the spoils of your mother’s obsession with Goodwill” voice.
This is a voice I hate, and the voice that plagues me. It’s the voice that I’ve had bumping around between my ears for most of my life, in different fashions, and it’s one I’m always working to keep at bay.
Here is one way I’m trying to keep it at bay, of late:
There’s a phrase bumping around the internet that I’ve heard a few times, and I’m liking it more and more with each repetition. At this point, I’m pretty confident someone has it tattooed on them somewhere, and, while I’m not at that point, I applaud those who are.
That phrase?
RUN YOUR RACE.
Let’s unpack it. First off, I believe we don’t have to call it a RACE, per say. It could be a non-competitive stroll, I think. And we don’t have to RUN it. I’m sure walking is fine.
But the idea is that you have a life, and you’re living that one. Not someone else’s. And so to make your life the best it can be it’s all about sticking your head (mostly) down and doing YOUR thing. Not looking around constantly to see where everyone else is doing and how far ahead or far behind they are and then stopping and twisting some dandelion stems as you ruminate on why they definitely don’t look like they are losing all their hair post-pregnancy and why they don’t dress their children in mismatching Goodwill finds. (Not that I’ve done that.)
It’s a short phrase that can mean a lot, and help folks like me guide me to back to center.
So that’s it.
What can you do to run your race?
Tell me below.
Claire,
Number one, your babies are dressed – simultaneously! That’s a win! Pre-owned clothing is A less expensive and B-environmentally conscious and C -softer. ?
We had three children in three years; if we had had Instagram or Facebook then, I would have been undone. The comparison gremlin would have undermined me at every turn.
Only you can do you. You will do you imperfectly and that is just what is needed in the world. The phrase I like to use is “stay in your own lane”. Also I remember “better done than perfect”. I try to show up, say yes, realize when I need to say No, and know I am enough. Peace, squeeze the wee ones for me! Remember to care for you as well! Dianne
LOVE This!!!
RUN YOUR RACE! Fantastic!! I am 42 years old and just started my career. I was a stay-at-home mom, a working mom, a working single mom, then a working stepmom, and now, finally, I am a career mom. I have gone through more ups and downs than I had ever imagined as a child, but somehow, it has all come together and now I’m doing something I LOVE as opposed to something I HAVE to do. I am teaching, and not teaching in a high school as I had thought, but I’m teaching adult immigrants how to speak English. NEVER had I ever thought that is something I would do! BUT this is where MY race has taken me and it is A-MAZING. Sometimes I wonder why it took me 40 years to get it right, but then I remember that I learned a lot along the way and I was able to be MOM to some amazing kids; it was my own journey that brought me here and I don’t regret any minute of it.
SO awesome;)
I was about to unsubscribe and then I scrolled down. Will stay subscribed – I needed the “do your thing” piece today. Thanks – here’s to staying on purpose and letting others do their thing.
Hi Claire,
I’ve never heard the the phrase but at work I always was a big fan of running my own race — doing what I thought was right. For me it was not playing office politics, which some people seem to do all the time. I was very lucky to work at a place where competence was rewarded, so for many years it was a successful formula for me. Just put your head down and do your job and you’ll be successful. It’s advice I gave others.
Cheers,
John Arthur
Thanks, John. Hope you’re SO well this season;) Head down it is.
Hello Claire
Your babies are so cute. I’m an older woman, worked at a newspaper for 10 years, then a stay at home mom with a freelance career on the side for over a dozen more. Now that my kids are out of the house I’m pursuing my true dream becoming a published author.
So to answer your question, I’m running my race by writing every day, getting my name, my books out there for everyone to see.
You’re so kind. And love it. Keep writing;)
Do you have a calendar where you’re checking off each day you write? 😉
Loved hearing you speak at the breakout session at Thrive! Thanks for sharing your wisdom.
I’ll be getting One Minute Mentor. Mentoring is difficult, but so needed for authors. I’ve been honored to be one, but also need to find one again. Continuing to learn from each other is essential.
Best wishes for your beautiful babes and family.
Thanks so much, Deb! I’m so grateful you were there — and for the well wishes!
“‘Child,’ said the Lion, ‘I am telling you your story, not hers. No one is told any story but their own.'”
C.S. Lewis, The Horse and His Boy (Chronicles of Narnia)